Keeping Friendships: Where do you draw the line?

As someone who has suffered from depression, I know what it feels like to be alone. I know what it feels like to think about negative ideas every single second of every waking moment, to not be able to trust anyone or feel that no one loves me. I know the dread, the suffocating feeling, the anxiety, the fears, and all the darkness that comes along with it.

So my heart is close to those who are going through or have gone through the same things. I try my best to be a good listener, the best friend you could ever have. I don’t want others to feel the same way, ever.

Yet, there are some friends who don’t appreciate the effort and time that you give them. No matter how much of yourself you give to be a friend, they still accuse you of being untrue. Just because you’re not there as much as they want you to be. They demand more of your time, more of your sympathy, even more than what you can offer. Even more than what you’re giving, considering you have to work a full-time job or go to school, spend time with family and friends, do your chores, and keep your own sanity.

You already went through all the advise you can possible give to help them feel better about themselves or their situation numerous times, the same action plans that you yourself are struggling with. To keep a healthy lifestyle, get a hobby, spend time with loved ones, to have a positive mindset, to stray away from the dark clouds of gloom. You, of all people, know that some battles are fought alone. But your friend is putting the burden on your shoulder, that you’re not paying enough attention.

The question is, where do you draw the line between understanding your friend and protecting yourself from an unhealthy relationship? Is depression a reason to demand more attention than what others can wholeheartedly give?

This situation reminds me of a saying,

“Two unhealthy people cannot have a healthy relationship.”

 

Let me know your thoughts in the comments.